Bad news from the world of campanology. A correspondence in The Ringing World ("The Weekly Journal for Church Bell Ringers since 1911") reveals that many bell ringers suffer panic attacks, becoming (not unreasonably) terrified that the enormous bells, swinging above them on five-hundred-year-old beams, are about to crash down and kill them. Apparently some 'ringing chambers' are so rickety that they swing around 'like the deck of a ship' when the bells are being rung. "One correspondent, Fred Miers, said after a severe attack he was unable to do anything for a week, apart from lie in bed with his eyes closed." Full story from The Guardian.
Obviously there's a simple solution: Sack the bell ringers and install Belltron MIDI church bells so the vicar can play them from his laptop in the vicarage.
More bells on Music Thing.