Drum machines fight back

Joshua from the actually-good-to-read Las Vegas blog Zen Archery writes: "I saw the story about the loony in Los Angeles who hates drum machines, and thought I'd provide something to remind people why we use drum machines in the first place."

Sure. Replace all those pesky TALENTED people like musicians, with geeks and engineers--they're bound to be better at emotional stuff like music than folks who foolishly work at musical TRAINING. Drum machines are like plastic prostheses for missing sex organs.
I am sure that the monks got rather pissed when the printing press came into wide use - oh well.

A drummer isn't the one being replaced - he can be the one playing the machine.

Who we are replacing are the renters of rooms and "select drums" with mics and some black art of recording "that special drum sound" who has held our songs hostage for years.

There is bad drum machine programming, and there is good drum machine programming. You can use pads. With the Gypsy Midi controller, you could even play the drum machine while jerking off. (Sorry).

Drummers like Jim Keltner (Dylan, etc.) have known this for years, and have used drum machines in many track over that last couple of decades.
There are some advantages to drum machines over drummers:
(1) They never show up late or drunk.
(2) You can turn them down.
(3) They keep time.
(4) They don't try to fuck your girlfriend.
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