Learn to play guitar like a superdork

VIDEO WEEK: Exactly 18 seconds into this [2.5mb WMV] guitar tapping tutorial video from metalmethod.com, this hairy dude, who is called Michael Angelo Batio, completely spazzes out in a way that puts Jim Motley to shame. It's alarming. Meanwhile, Brad from Brad Sucks has been learning tapping himself: "After years of not knowing how to do it and being too ashamed to ask, this Quicktime video taught me how to do the most wanky and weedly of guitar tricks." What's the synth-geek equivalent of tapping, and could someone send me a video of it? UPDATE: A new (and infinitely more hardcore) video of Michael HERE. UPDATE: Mr Battio is, according to one commenter who went to school with him, 50 years old.

that is fucking rad, like totally tubular - i wonder if i can figure out a way to play my keyboard like a superdork
Is Jan Hammer pitch bend soloing the synth geek equivilent? Or the arpeggiated solo, also invented by Eddie Van Halen?
Yeah, why don't you do a special on synth note bending or better, on synth-guitar heroes...
Synth tapping? You can do pretty much the same thing as this guy does on his guitar. Use a monophonic sound, leave one finger on a key, and simply press and release keys higher up the scale while holding down the first key. It'll sound just like guitar tapping. Trow in a short glissando to make it extra fancy.
He's the guitarist from Nitro!

The singer from that band used to shatter glass with his high notes, I guess that's the vocalistic equivalent of being a guitar/keyboard/drumming super dork.
cool blog
yeah dude i rip off tapping on a monosynth constantly. well more like once a show. its too hilarious not to. just hold a lower note, and then hit notes in the next octave up while letting the lower note fire every other note. works well with a little fuzz (big muff, ds-1 or the like) and a simple saw wave with last note priority, (high note priority would also work) gets good response. I also use super fast arp with 2 octave range for solo, is that the EVH thing? sounds like nintendo to me. (use square wave)
Isn't it obvious? The superdork equivalent of guitar tapping is playing ANY kind of strap-on keyboard. As proof, I offer this: Name ONE person who has played one of those that actually looked cool; as further proof, I offer that "fastest finger in the world" chick, who couldn't even make a remote keyboard sexy whilst wearing next to and grinding on it like some kind of polka stripper.
Probably posted here before but

While we're on the subject of strap-on keyboards:


(Thanks to Alex for sending this in a while back)

The synth equivalent would be to slap your dick across the keyboard, bouncing it on the keys at high velocity - i would send you a video except i've only just finished cleaning it after last time!
You haven't seen ANYTHING until you've seen Michael play his four necked guitar :). Go onto kazaa or your P2P equivalent and type in 4 neck guitar solo.

I was under the impression that Michael exclusively used Dean guitars??? :/
"Name ONE person who has played one of those that actually looked cool;" (Strap on keyboards)

Edgar Winter!
John Tesh looked pretty cool. He had a bitchin keytar when he played Black Sabbath's Wizard with Dweezil and Ahmet on Conan O'Bryan.
Totally bitchin.
George Duke of the Zappa band and solo project looked good with his Clavitar. Also the keyboard player for The Time (Jesse Johnson I think?) looked good with their choreography.
Edgar Winter? really?
Edgar Winter is a scientologist.

I think he looks pretty cool. At least he's using a moog cv/gate keyboard to control an arp, which is more stylish than most.
A JV8000 round the neck does not look quite so good!
Though the leopard skin strap makes up for it a little.
Haha, that looks like me playing guitar. Except he's waaaay better.

Meh, I'll keep trying...

For a cool person playing a strap-on synth, check out Aavikko.
Okay... c'mon now. Maybe aavikko make cool music (I've never heard them) but they most certainly look rather foppish. I mean, compare, just for coolness, this to this.

what's up with the half-windsor knot in their ties, talk about cheaping out the look of suit.
Amazing. It would be even better if I knew how to play :)
Sure, a bit wanky but absolutely amazing guitar playing!!
How about the chick in Zlad!?

Nobody ever looked cooler.

I think the equiv would be something like playing one of thouse double step harpsichord solos with the alternating notes but on a synth with lots of pizazz no?

And wearing a cape.
This is hilarious! He puts EVH to shame!
This is the 30th comment for this post. I think it's an MT record, but what do I know.
Truly a testament to the power of Metal.
"truly a testament to the power of metal"

Except when you consider that a lot of those posts are not exactly positive regarding his (abeit technically admirable) playing, or are not about him at all, but about strap-on keyboards.

I think it's more of a testament to the electric guitar being a dying instrument. Instead of anything truly creative/innovative/emotional being done with it, most people are simply doing the same thing (but faster!) or graverobbing the past (ala Jet, Kenny Wayne Shepherd, etc.)

I think its a little unfair to say that the guitar is a dying instrument. people were saying that years ago when synths began appearing but guitars have become even more widespread since then

also taking mr Angelo's impressive but none the less pretty ridiculous skills as the be all and end all of what people are doing with guitars just seems a little short sighted.

i wont try to list inventive guitar bands/artists and what not since opinion is all subjective. ill just say that shred guitar is an impressive talent but its basically just a more socially acceptable form of masturbation when you get down to it and is only a small part of what can be done with a plank of wood and some strings
Johnny G, you are correct sir. A lot of bands are playing SLOWER and creating unbelievably emotionally intense music - eg Neurosis, Isis, Red Sparowes, Pelican, etc. There's so much good music out there these days (isn't that a change from 10 years ago?) that i'm losing interest in electronic music.
Tapping on string instruments exists in many other forms besides metal-style.

Some people to check out...

Stanley Jorden

Trey Gunn


Preston Reed

Bill Burke

Kevin Keith

I just saw this--very nice....

I am now scared to go to sleep.

My denim jacket in the closet has begun to grow leatherette tassles.

My jeans have odd holes in f'dup places with strings pouring out of them like cascadein fireworks.

My hair has bang. . . for head banging.

I will never listen to www.kexp.org the same again.

Good night, lords of the underworld.
He's not tapping, watch his right hand. He's just *fingering*. Tapping is a different and much more difficult art.

Go back to your jupiter 8s.
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Coolest strap-on keyboard show ever: Chick Corea using a teenie-weenie Yamaha KX5 to control his Synclavier on stage.
Different genre, though. But with Dave Weckl on drums and John Patitucci on bass, this was one way cool show (forgot the guitarist's name, but he was so stoned he couldn't have remembered anything from that gig anyway... ;-)
If you want to get as crazy on a synth as our superdork friend did on guitar, I think you have to take it up a step and strap it on upside-down.
Playing above your head is good too--just make sure you pick a 'board that's more more Micron than Jupiter 8 ;P
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
I must say Victor Wooten deserves more than just a glance imo. Any cat who can pull off guitar god (ech!) style taps n shreds on a bass wins the 20 I had a friend who said wammy bars were wasted on a bass...

...he don't say that no more :P
Intersesting how he uses 3 different guitars, once or twice changes settings on them and the sound of the guitars constantly stays the exact same! FAAAAAAKE! He probably played this solo himself, he's quite skilled, but that video is totally playback!
He is not tapping in the part you are all talking about. That is just pull offs, he is picking the open string and then fretting it.
Here goes again: You electro-geeks are so weak. This guy was shredding on custom made double-neck guitars before most of you were probably even born. He's a talented musician actually playing an instrument as opposed to running sequences and loops through a mac while smugly lounging about thinking how new, original, and cool you are.

"guitar superdork"? Whatever... He hangs with all the greats: Les Paul; Eric Johnson; Joe Satriani; Kerry King; Jim Marshall (yeah that Marshall). Think they respect him? Hell yeah. Think they respect you? Think again...

synth-noise can be fine, and has it's place but don't bash someone who can actually play an instrument, eh?
soooo, that guy isnt in dragonforce is he?
He may be a mullet head but his skills are uncontestable.

Maybe its because I grew up with 80's heavy rock but I thought that was impressive.
Although I have to admit I'm glad the hairstyles have gone out of fashion.
By the way the guitar will never go out of fashion. Thats kind of a silly comment.
Learn guitar online
HAHAHa! This guy said "strap-on", talking about his dorky keyboard instrument! I thought this was a guitar article. I am an insomniac. Thanks for boring me to sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
does anybody know Michael Angelo
Batio's age?

I cannot seem to find the year that he was born on any of the Bio's on the web...
Oh, LOL!!

Wait until Jennifer Love Hewitt---
a Dork from Texas---sees this

Yes, she sure DOES have an
electric guitar (in fact,SEVERAL
of them by now).
To see JLH with an electric guitar,
go to WireImage.com . Then,put the
page selector to page "9" (as of
May 18,2006).
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
The JLH photos w/electric guitar
have moved to page 11 on WireImage
(re: today's date, June 16,2006).

They are the ONLY photos in exist-
ance of this actress with an electric guitar!
""guitar superdork"? Whatever... He hangs with all the greats: Les Paul; Eric Johnson; Joe Satriani; Kerry King; Jim Marshall (yeah that Marshall). Think they respect him? Hell yeah. Think they respect you? Think again..."
Jim Marshall is NOT known as a guitarist - he builds amps. Kerry King is not regarded by anybody outside his own genre as "great". Les Paul is better known for things other than his guitar playing (even though he is good). Satch is OK, if you like that sort of stuff.
Other than that (at least amongst the guitarists that I know), Michael Angelo is regarded as a tosser. Where's the emotion? Where are the dynamics? Anyone can learn to shred, it only requires physical dexterity, not musical talent.
Perhaps he could gain something from John Petrucci and his free lessons on youtube:
Look at the right hand frame - there are several lessons there
Then, perhaps, he could gain from a lesson from Yngwie
Then again, he could learn from a real guitarist:
Jennifer Love Hewitt with electric
guitar has moved to page 14 on
WireImage.com (Aug.8,2006)
Jennifer Love Hewitt now on page
18, WireImage, September 9,2006.

Image can be enlarged only to about
175, then it gets pixillated (unless you buy it from the company).
Michael angelo Batio is 50 years old. I went to high school with him. He doesn't want people to know his age though though so this is our secret......
If you any of you guys had the slightest clue what you were talking about, you would understand how insane what he's doing really is. OK, he does look pretty funny, but it's still insanely difficult are requires an immense amount of talent. As to people playing fast, It's nothing new. Look at classical music. They play and add intense emotion into the music. It's the same with the guitar today. Now there are people who play fast to just play fast, but there are others who play fast and still keep it melodic.
If you do a people search on Michael Batio you will see that he is in fact 50 years old.


Also shows relatives and locations.

As of today (Dec.21,2006)WireImage
has re-numbered its pages.

Therefore,the photo of JLH with
electric guitar has been moved.

It's viewable now by clicking on
main page "2" and then finding
"Grammy Talent Lounge" for 2006
as a sub-heading.

Photo can then be found about the
middle of the page.
Now,make that "main page 1"...

Apparently,WireImage is doing
some revamping of its website...

Might go back to its original
format...In the meantime,I'll
keep you posted.
OK. Make that "main page 2"

Grammy Talent Lounge,2nd day...
early February,2006.
Brand NEW photo of Jennifer Love
Hewitt with ANOTHER electric

"Grammy Talent Lounge" 2007, on
WireImage. Event was Feb.10.
Way cool, but whats up with that hair? He should lose the wig and get some transplants! I saw this guy on www.keytomusic.com
Visit Us.Hait loss?, let me help
It kills me that nobody notice he's SO FAST HE CHANGED GUITARS! WHILE PLAYING! *lol* Seriously, though-- what's up with that? Couldn't get a whole take in between beers or what?
Keep on keeping on! Your blog is one of the best!
Whenever I see Michael Angelo playing, I am always amazed at the level of skill he has. But, and it is a big but....he has no real feel for playing. He plays like a robot, no deft touches, just mental speed and music by numbers scales. Not for me.
Amazing! I want to learn that! I'm beginner and have no idea how to play that yet! This site http://www.youguitarist.net is helping me a lot with free online guitar lessons
The synth equivalent is playing the filter knobs like you're really doing something when basically you're just turning a knob.
You can sort of do tapping on a synth if it has a good long ribbon controller (like the Kurzweil K series, or the Kurzweil Super Ribbon).


Rock on, indeed.
There are rumors that it is not real or at least there is some cheating with karaoke playing. Anyway I continue to learn guitar playing with free videos.
WHY IS BEING GOOD AT GUITAR WANKY AND DORKY. Whats wrong with people these days, theres no talent anymore.
All I can say is that it takes a lifetime of practice to be able to play like that. The slapping with the hands almost looked fake and doctored up, but the hand with the pick was still keeping time so I assume it was real.
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